.

I hang on to my stupid phone so tight.

Its my only you, right with me, all the time. You make it pure.

Its really crazy but, I love the distance between us, baby.

We've grown so tight, that its a pity there's no more challenge to face.

We did it, the first time.

We won it, long back.

This is it.

You and me.

I'll always have you, forever. I love you very much.

I wish I could give you the world.

But all I can, kiss the phone enough to make you miss me even more.

I believe in you.

You're so, pure, so godlike, so , so THERE, its unbelievable.

I hang on to you.

I really love you very much, and I shout everytime.

I always cry, when you don't think I am.

I love you, Arshiya.

the original whatever.

i write the same, i realise.

Yawn.

the font, the style, the correct grammar, nt lyk dis.

sad.

oh, they didnt red-underline 'dis'.

And dis too.

Okay, weird.

I sound like Deeganto.

No no, I don't want that.

No stray praying mantis here, people, or tai chi, or kung fu.

WHAT?! I liked Drillbit Taylor!

Been listening to this Maurice Williams song on end.

The first time I heard the name Maurice was in a Tintin. reminds me of a dairy.

Yeah.

What?! I'm entitled to say anything.

Oh and, for anyone, who thinks a chocolate - chocolate combo CANNOT suck, try M&Ms and Hershey's.

Thats, saag.

I want to write dark stuff tooo! About castles, purple moors, treetops, forest canopy, Akon!

PSP Go has one preloaded game, a weird one called Patapon.

Sheesh.

Manchester won again.

Its just, ugly.

i'm bored.

i don't even deserve a blog.

go read someone else's.

this is crap.

balderdash.

kwaight, but not kwaight.

lets just say that what i do think of sometimes, when my brain's buffeting, is too complicated, weird to write here, I swear.

This is bad.

Arshiya's blog is GOOD.

It's dinner.

Au revoir!

Or, as Aditya put it, Bonjour! =))

PAA! HAHA!

Longings.

All I do is kiss you, through the bars of a rhyme.

I'd do the stars with you any time.

x.

What's in the linger of a cold whisper, that' so soothing? That's, somehow, a melting point for your senses?

The power of the guitar, that can kill you in an instant?

That can make you CRY, literally, CRY?!

What's in a word, sometimes, that can totally change how you feel about another person?

Even a gesture?

How is it, that people who were destined to be together, do, LUCKILY, end up that way?

How is it so beautiful?

How are you so beautiful?

What's in a book, that can so totally make you obsess over it?

What's in a habit, that has the power to soothe you?

What's in that sudden adrenaline rush, that makes you feel like another person?

In that state of induced happiness, that makes you feel lightheaded, and above everyone?

What's in that person's mind, who chooses to commit suicide?

Can you ever judge someone like that?

That feeling of helplessness, when you realize power is beyond you.

Does it scare you?

To be insignificant?

To be not remembered?

To die alone?

I wonder why old, sick, and cold, are synonymous when it comes to death?

Can't a person feel happy, alone?

Are we that dependent?

Why do we allow someone in when we know its not gonna remain?

But then, sometimes, it stays.

What's so beautiful about a heartbreak, and the sunshine after?

And the decadence that follows?

Why is it that, just before someone, anyone, dies, there is a brief moment, when the person can be saved, and we lose it?

And it haunts?

Isn't that why we cry.

Why is that night so shallow?

When you feel one with the hereafter?

Is it easy enough, then? To let go?

Is living harder?

All I know is, I want you here with me, coz love is all we need.

You and me babe, how about it?

One, Twenty One Guns, Aimed At My Heart.

I could tell you how you make me feel.

I could tell you the EXACT feeling I get, starstruck, thunderstruck, when I think of yr eyes.

Of how you explode into my thoughts with all those colors.

Of how yr photos actually move for me, how I have that squirmy feeling deep in me when I see yr smile.

Of what it does to me.

Of how you make me feel when you breathe, when you 'Mmmm' at me.

When you take my name, even when you take yr own name?

When yr annoyed with me, but will still not hurt me?

Of how yr always looking out for me?

How you make me feel unreal, how I want to close my eyes, when we talk.

You make me feel peaceful.

You don't know how special you really are.

And I don't feel bad writing cliche-s here, coz what I feel for you is pure.

And I do love you.

And that's just how it is.

Like I said, only I can see yr wings.

Pink and silver, shine on, you crazy diamond.

I'm a sucker for you, and only you know me, every part of me, and my soul.

The euphoric feeling that I have whenever you do ANYTHING for me, is also done to me.

(Yeah well, I know only you'll understand this.xD)

I can close my eyes in peace when I think of you.

I can dance, lying on the bed, when I think of you, when the song is playing.

(I go CRAAA-AAAAAZY!)

You don't know how much I need you, how much I don't need everything that's around me.

How much it would mean to me if you said it again.

I love you, Sarvar.

But then, I wouldn't tell you anything at all.

I love you Arshiya.

You're the deadliest game ever, and you're making me pay.

And I love it.

When The Music's Over.

Even I would expect me to write after all that's happened today.

Smoking alone is not advisable, it kills. R E A L L Y.

I don't know how you do it girl.

And no matter how much time you spend in the shower, some stuff can't be cleansed.

The feeling stays that way.

The lead in the pit of yr stomach, the unbarfed codswallop, if you will.

Sometimes, just sometimes, YOU won't be there to help.

Just sometimes, I'll be alone out there, unprotected.

Behaving like an adult.

I've seen it, and it's scary.

Maybe that's why I'm so into you. Protective charms, summon darkness around me, sooner or later.

How do I explain to thee, that you ARE the beacon.

That you are happiness.

I never expected me to talk like this, but somehow, guilt has started engulfing.

I could make it all right, but maybe I'm a coward.

And I don't have time, either.

I've seen it, and it's scary.

Believe me, staring in the light, isn't all that easy.

I.Die.Everytime.

And it's all my fault.

Maybe that's the thing, I have no one to blame.

I wish we could do this again.

Living two lives isn't ALL that nice, I wish you were here.

The phone is not my best friend anymore.

I've seen it, and it's scary.

A little bit of hell this time.

I experienced pain today, I never knew I could hold such amounts of grief, guilt, and all that, in me.

But I don't wanna be that deep. I've got some friends inside, but that doesn't solace me, AT ALL.

Why, though?

Maybe I AM a loner, maybe yr breaking through that.

Maybe I'm scared, Maybe I'm content.

But then, maybe darker things approach.

Can't wait for dawn?

Neither can I.

I've seen it, and it's scary.

But that's okay.

But that's okay.

|Wind me up, put me down, start me up, and watch me go.|

x.

The darkest hour doesn't come in the night.

I bow down to life.

I love you so much.

Thankyou.

Thank you.

The Big Red Tree

I've let myself listen to Pink Floyd again, and now I'm in this weird mood ALL over again.

Doesnt that happen with you people?

There's just something that, Idk, doesn't leap at you, makes you listen to it at the back of your mind, where its gna affect the longest.

When you dodn't even get why you're actually listening to PF in the first place.

It's dark music, my friend.

You know what else is dark, The Sound Of Silence.

It's like Simon and Grafunkel dare you to not fall in love with the urban-metropolitan-dark-alleyway-long-cloaked-everyone's-a-stranger thing.

I love it, anyway.

'The words of the prophet are written on the subway walls.'

This line KILLS.

Also, Strange Love, by Koop.

That song actaully scared me the first time.

The emotion runs through you, you can actually feel the strength, and the gentle harshness of the song. The posing threat, idk.

It's dark music.

Something that'll depress you immensely, and make you actually believe.

I can't write.

Come away, come away, if yr going.

My love! My life! YOU!

Sarvar!

You hate me right now because I'm not replying but I realised that I just HAD to tell you how awesome you are!

I love you oh-so-much! What would I SERIOUSLY do without you?! How would I sail through my event less life without your presence?

I just love you so much. SO SO SO much. I GLOAT over our bonding. I feel so happy when I CLAIM that you're mine. Your voice takes me to another level of happiness. I love you without an iota of doubt. I love you more than I've loved ANYONE else. I love you with EVERY fibre of my being.

You're the serenity WITHIN me.

Even when I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to myself about you.

I wake up every morning to your 'Baby!xDDD' text and do a little pirouette in the bed itself!

You're the bestest person ever, baby!

Really.

You're my silver lining. I laugh at all our jokes even after we're done talking.

Your voice echoes in my heart and your words pierce through my soul.

My heart feels like a feather upon wind when you tell me how you feel.

I feel so blessed to have you, baby. Really.

I will do everything I can, to make YOU feel as good as you make me feel.

I love you, Sarvar.

-Arshiya.

No, not Acacia.

then, and never.

you just realised that each and evry one of yr idea, has just occurred to a million people.

you just realised yr not the only one who thinks of cool stuff.

yes, cool.

you just made up some lyrics.

guess what, some knocked up band in Ohio did the same.

you feel, just like me, that it would have been fun living in a simpler time.

people had it easy then.

they didn't KNOW.

they didn't get criticised.

people weren't unfair to them.

it was a much simpler time, it had much simpler hearts.

a cake was all it took to make another smile.

a bicycle was all it took to go and meet every one you knew.

the farms were greener, the water was purer.

they didn't KNOW.

the way of the gypsies.

still, believe, sigh.

they didn't know.

we do, and we ignore.

oh yes, the only change that has come about is our conscience, its much more complex.

i cannot think of a single way of doing good, that doesn't have a downside.

can you?

it's always the same, always.

you wouldn't know, you had it easy.

the time has come, for a great flood.

we don't know.

What?! I never make sense.

I love you Arshiya.^^

Bleak?

its just one of those days, just one of those days.

it's really odd how you can control my emotions like this, how I feel a part of yr life, over there.

and, also, how I'm jealous of the other life you have.

how I'm made to think of each and every reason why I want you to come here, and remain, everytime.

it's just one of those days.

what I feel everytime you sigh, has not, till yet, been explained.

if that makes sense.

evrytime i look at what i have of you, just a stupid photograph, i smile to, and at, myself.

look what I got into, look at how perfect it is, and how unstable it may be.

but, this, I know, yr the only one.

it's just one of those days.

C'mon

C'mon

C'mon

C'mon

over par.

you know i want to write.. so much.

i know she wants to write.

i know she wants me to write.

so, yeh.

look around yr room, don't you see a kind of link.

like, say, the balled up sock in the corner, the other of which you've never seen in living history.

and the old, Old OLD Beatles tape that just sits on top of the player, the kind of thing that yr only gonna TRY to play on a hot Sunday.

the unfinished salad on the edge of the bed.

the rusted wine goblet that you love so much, and have stood up for it when everyone wanted to throw it out.

the set of novels that have just been given to you, and you've been told they're good, but you KNOW yr never gna read them.

all these things kind of look to you, stare at you.

the things that you try to USE when yr writing shit.

or when yr sitting infront of the door, staring in space.

the creepy vibes of the goblet, the tape reminding you of a much simpler time, when people believed in free love.

the sock, significant, reminding you of the amount of football you used to play after you'd finish yr homework, when you were in seventh grade.

my room is creepy.

yes it is.

i love you arshiya.

*~*

pick yr poison.

Nobody Died.

Hello, she said, I miss you quite terribly. Far away, right here, it's how I see you, you'll probably be in tears.
Sigh, would thee believe? I plead. And now at this time, when you lie, silent.
Do you hear it, that's me.
Flowers and wine, thy ship sails without any water. Can't keep it together, would you learn?
A thousand miles. And still we smile.
Isn't that the way?

-Sarvar.

The windows to my life, I see thee in the corner.

Standing, thy hair glows.

The sunlight, you that shined.

Off yr hair, you enlighten my night.

You there, standing looking pretty.

Yr the longview I can't wait to have.

The light, thou is.

.x

Saccharine.

Imperfect x.

Have fought, have lost.

Flipped 180, his life did. The fallen hero.

Fallen, the last comrade.

Smiled, as the heavens whispered. Come hither, brother, it's done.

Point proved, no one moved. All in vain.

Content, he surrendered his mortal self.

Forget me not, true believers.

The hunger ends, for how long.

There I go, playing star again.

x.

Saccharine.

Fanastia Finesse.

A wildflower still grows on the side of the road.
x.

Carefree travel, back in time.

To a place we never been. Something, that has always deluded us, our ways.

The original myth, just darker.

Older.

To a land, hostile, yet inviting.

Seductive, even.

A preserved memory, to the hereafter. Soothingly, seemingly, the final escape.

The dream that won't wash away, won't clear.

Starry nights, we deserve more.

Even so, just as much, adore.

God bless the dead road.

The path to ignored, blessed, infinity.

Of feeling content, at last.

And then came thee.

x.

existing deep in time.

Chasing cars.
x.

Fashioned me into what I am today.
Like a searchlight, coursing all through. Reflecting the revulsions.
Constructing in time.
Fortunate enough to reveal me to myself.
Factually, actually, we do lie close.
Still searching, and still satisfied, yet unsatisfied.
Of the warmth thats shared.
Only when you're heard, like poison.
Stay calm, olde friende.

Our time runs out.
x.